Longing
Lectionary readings for November 18, 2018
1 Samuel 1:4-20 and 1 Samuel 2:1-10;
Daniel 12:1-3 and Psalm 16;
Hebrews 10:11-14, (15-18), 19-25;
Mark 13:1-8
The lectionary opens this week with the story of Hannah’s deep grief regarding her childlessness, and the multiplying of that grief by the reality that she carries her loss alone while others flaunt their good fortune.
Hannah’s misfortune is something she cannot change.
She feels completely alone, because most people have what she wants and they don’t realize how much their good fortune magnifies the depth of Hannah’s loss. They have what she does not have. Every time she sees them she is reminded of her longing and her powerlessness. Being told that she has things she could be thankful for does not help her at all. Being reminded that she is deeply loved does not ease her emotional pain. She pours out her grief in her yearly trip to the tabernacle.
Of course the story goes on. Hannah prays with such fervor that she is mistakenly accused of being drunk...and then God answers her prayer for children and Samuel is born. The second passage in 1 Samuel is the song she sings of her gratitude to God. This song includes themes of justice, and of flipping the script so that those who lack will trade places with those who have plenty. The barren will have many children while those who already have many children will be forlorn.
Hannah has been mistreated because of her barrenness. There is no doubt about that. Still, I don’t quite understand this song where Hannah includes her readiness to see suffering for others in her praise of God’s intervention.
One thing I love about the Bible is the truth that God desires honesty from us. Hannah is not disguising her pain, even in her song of praise. She brings to God her joy in her release from the shame and pain of barrenness, and also the bitterness she still carries toward those who make her life hard during that time. She sings her truth.
Hannah prayed for what she desired. She probably prayed for years, and then she was answered. But this is a story, not a prescription. We are to bring all our requests to God, but some of our deepest wishes are not answered. I wish for clues in the readings about how to live in that kind of reality.
Psalm 16 speaks repeatedly of seeing the relationship with God as being the highest blessing.
“I have no good apart from You.”
“The LORD is my chosen portion and my cup;
you hold my lot.”
“I keep the LORD always before me;
because he is at my right hand, I shall not be moved.”
“You show me the path of life.
In your presence there is fullness of joy;
in your right hand are pleasures forevermore.”
Could Hannah have spoken these words? Would she eventually have been able to affirm them even if she had remained barren?
The Daniel passage refers both to anguish and deliverance.
Hebrews continues the theme of Jesus being the high priest, and especially focuses on two things: first, the fact that all the other high priests had to offer sacrifice for their own sin but Jesus ends that necessity;
and second, the idea that God has written the covenant on our hearts and in our minds.
God has indeed shown us the path of life.
The link between Hebrews and 1 Samuel is the presence of a priest. The link between Mark and 1 Samuel is the location...the temple. The temple was seen as the dwelling place of God, but Jesus foretells its destruction.
Hannah came to the house of the Lord to offer her plea to God. But now, God is in our hearts, and with the body of Christ---the body of believers.
I don’t have a feel good answer for Hannah, or for those who ache for something they may never have. Their honesty about their pain should not be pushed away with easy platitudes. God wanted Hannah’s truth, and God wants ours.
That is all I can offer.
The Psalmist affirms that it is in our relationship with God where the fullness of joy comes.
The Psalms also include psalms of anguish. Bringing the pain to God and to others is what Hannah did, and what the Psalmist does. Maybe that ends up being the path through the grief and loss. Maybe it just gives us a sense of presence while we grieve.
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